“Miss O'Hara—I—I had already decided that if we did fight, I'd go over to South Carolina and join a troop there. It's said that Mr.Wade Hampton is organizing a cavalry troop, and of course I would want to go with him.He's a splendid person and was my father's best friend.”
Scarlett thought,“What am I supposed to do—give three cheers?”for Charles'expression showed that he was baring his heart's secrets to her. She could think of nothing to say and so merely looked at him, wondering why men were such fools as to think women interested in such matters.He took her expression to mean stunned approbation and went on rapidly, daringly—
“If I went—would—would you be sorry, Miss O'Hara?”
“I should cry into my pillow every night,”said Scarlett, meaning to be flippant, but he took the statement at face value and went red with pleasure. Her hand was concealed in the folds of her dress and he cautiously wormed his hand to it and squeezed it, overwhelmed at his own boldness and at her acquiescence.
“Would you pray for me?”
“What a fool!”thought Scarlett bitterly, casting a surreptitious glance about her in the hope of being rescued from the conversation.
“Would you?”
“Oh—yes, indeed, Mr. Hamilton.Three Rosaries a night, at least!”
Charles gave a swift look about him, drew in his breath, stiffened the muscles of his stomach. They were practically alone and he might never get another such opportunity.And, even given another such Godsent occasion, his courage might fail him.
“Miss O'Hara—I must tell you something. I—I love you!”
“Um?”said Scarlett absently, trying to peer through the crowd of arguing men to where Ashley still sat talking at Melanie's feet.
“Yes!”whispered Charles, in a rapture that she had neither laughed, screamed nor fainted, as he had always imagined young girls did under such circumstances.“I love you!You are the most—the most—”and he found his tongue for the first time in his life.“The most beautiful girl I've ever known and the sweetest and the kindest, and you have the dearest ways and I love you with all my heart. I cannot hope that you could love anyone like me but, my dear Miss O'Hara, if you can give me any encouragement, I will do anything in the world to make you love me.I will—”
Charles stopped, for he couldn't think of anything difficult enough of accomplishment to really prove to Scarlett the depth of his feeling, so he said simply:“I want to marry you.”
Scarlett came back to earth with a jerk, at the sound of the word“marry.”She had been thinking of marriage and of Ashley, and She looked at Charles with poorly concealed irritation. Why must this calf-like fool intrude his feelings on this particular day when she was so worried she was about to lose her mind?She looked into the pleading brown eyes and she saw none of the beauty of a shy boy's first love, of the adoration of an ideal come true or the wild happiness and tenderness that were sweeping through him like a flame.Scarlett was used to men asking her to marry them, men much more attractive than Charles Hamilton, and men who had more finesse than to propose at a barbecue when she had more important matters on her mind.She only saw a boy of twenty, red as a beet and looking very silly.She wished that she couldtell him how silly he looked.But automatically, the words Ellen had taught her to say in such emergencies rose to her lips and casting down her eyes, from force of long habit, she murmured:“Mr.Hamilton, I am not unaware of the honor you have bestowed on me in wanting me to become your wife, but this is all so sudden that I do not know what to say.”
That was a neat way of smoothing a man's vanity and yet keeping him on the string, and Charles rose to it as though such bait were new and he the first to swallow it.
“I would wait forever!I wouldn't want you unless you were quite sure. Please, Miss O'Hara, tell me that I may hope!”
“Um,”said Scarlett, her sharp eyes noting that Ashley, who had not risen to take part in the war talk, was smiling up at Melanie. If this fool who was grappling for her hand would only keep quiet for a moment, perhaps she could hear what they were saying.She must hear what they said.What did Melanie say to him that brought that look of interest to his eyes?
Charles'words blurred the voices she strained to hear.
“Oh, hush!”she hissed at him, pinching his hand and not even looking at him.
Startled, at first abashed, Charles blushed at the rebuff and then, seeing how her eyes were fastened on his sister, he smiled. Scarlett was afraid someone might hear his words.She was naturally embarrassed and shy, and in agony lest they be overheard.Charles felt a surge of masculinity such as he had never experienced, for this was the first time in his life that he had ever embarrassed any girl.The thrill was intoxicating.He arranged his face in what he fancied was an expression of careless unconcern and cautiously returned Scarlett's pinch to show that he was man of the world enough to understand and accept her reproof.
She did not even feel his pinch, for she could hear clearly the sweet voice that was Melanie's chief charm:“I fear I cannot agree with you about Mr. Thackeray's works.He is a cynic.I fear he is not the gentleman Mr.Dickens is.”