MR.SOLOMON PELL, ASSISTED BY A SELECT COMMITTEEOF COACHMEN, ARRANGES THE AFFAIRS OF THE ELDER MR.WELLER" SAMIVEL," said Mr.Weller, accosting his son on the morning after the funeral, "I've found it, Sammy.I thought it wos there.""Thought wot wos were?" inquired Sam.
"Your mother-in-law's vill, Sammy," replied Mr.Weller.
"In wirtue o' vich, them arrangements is to be made as I told you on, last night, respectin' the funs.""Wot, didn't she tell you were it wos?" inquired Sam.
"Not a bit on it, Sammy," replied Mr.Weller."We wos a adjestin' our little differences, and I wos a cheerin' her spirits and bearin' her up, so that I forgot to ask anythin' about it.I don't know as I should ha'
done it indeed, if I had remembered it," added Mr.Weller, "for it's a rum sort o' thing, Sammy, to go a hankerin' arter anybody's property, ven you're assistin' 'em in illness.It's like helping an outside passenger up, ven he's been pitched off a coach, and puttin' your hand in his pocket, vile you ask him vith a sigh how he finds hisself, Sammy."With this figurative illustration of his meaning, Mr.Weller unclasped his pocket-book, and drew forth a dirty sheet of letter paper, on which were inscribed various characters crowded together in remarkable confusion.
"This here is the dockyment, Sammy," said Mr.Weller.
"I found it in the little black teapot, on the top shelf o' the bar closet.She used to keep bank notes there, afore she vos married, Samivel.
I've seen her take the lid off, to pay a bill, many and many a time.Poor creetur, she might ha' filled all the teapots in the house vith vills, and not have inconwenienced herself neither, for she took wery little of anythin' in that vay lately, 'cept on the Temperance nights, ven they just laid a foundation o' tea to put the spirits a-top on!""What does it say?" inquired Sam.
"Jist vot I told you, my boy," rejoined his parent."Two hundred pound vurth o' reduced counsels to my son-in-law, Samivel, and all the rest o'
my property, of ev'ry kind and description wotsoever to my husband, Mr.
Tony Veller, who I appint as my sole eggzekiter.""That's all, is it?" said Sam.
"That's all," replied Mr.Weller."And I s'pose as it's all right and satisfactory to you and me as is the only parties interested, ve may as vell put this bit o' paper into the fire.""Wot are you a-doin' on, you lunatic?" said Sam, snatching the paper away, as his parent, in all innocence, stirred the fire preparatory to suiting the action to the word."You're a nice eggzekiter, you are.""Vy not?" inquired Mr.Weller, looking sternly round, with the poker in his hand.
"Vy not!" exclaimed Sam." 'Cos it must be proved, and probated, and swore to, and all manner o' formalities.""You don't mean that?" said Mr.Weller, laying down the poker.
Sam buttoned the will carefully in a side pocket; intimating by a look, meanwhile, that he did mean it, and very seriously too.
"Then I'll tell you wot it is," said Mr.Weller, after a short meditation, "this is a case for that 'ere confidential pal o' the Chancellorship's.
Pell must look into this, Sammy.He's the man for a difficult question at law.Ve'll have this here, brought afore the Solvent Court directly.
Samivel."
"I never did see such a addle-headed old creetur!" exclaimed Sam, irritably, "Old Baileys, and Solvent Courts, and alleybis, and ev'ry species o' gammon alvays a runnin' through his brain! You'd better get your out o' door clothes on, and come to town about this bisness, than stand a preachin' there about wot you don't understand nothin' on.""Wery good, Sammy," replied Mr.Weller, "I'm quite agreeable to anythin'
as vill hexpedite business, Sammy.But mind this here, my boy, nobody but Pell--nobody but Pell as a legal adwiser.""I don't want anybody else," replied Sam."Now, are you a-comin'?""Vait a minit, Sammy," replied Mr.Weller, who, having tied his shawl with the aid of a small glass that hung in the window, was now, by dint of the most wonderful exertions, struggling into his upper garments."Vait a minit, Sammy; ven you grow as old as your father, you von't get into your veskit quite as easy as you do now, my boy.""If I couldn't get into it easier than that, I'm blessed if I'd vear vun at all," rejoined his son.
"You think so now," said Mr.Weller, with the gravity of age, "but you'll find that as you get vider, you'll get viser.Vidth and visdom, Sammy, alvays grows together."As Mr.Weller delivered this infallible maxim--the result of many years'
personal experience and observation--he contrived, by a dexterous twist of his body, to get the bottom button of his coat to perform its office.
Having paused a few seconds to recover breath, he brushed his hat with his elbow, and declared himself ready.
"As four heads is better than two, Sammy," said Mr.Weller, as they drove along the London Road in the chaise cart, "and as all this here property is a wery great temptation to a legal gen'l'm'n, ve'll take a couple o'
friends o' mine vith us, as'll be wery soon down upon him if he comes anythin'
irreg'lar; two o' them as saw you to the Fleet that day.They're the wery best judges," added Mr.Weller in a half whisper, "the wery best judges of a horse, you ever know'd.""And of a lawyer too?" inquired Sam.
"The man as can form a ackerate judgment of a animal, can form a ackerate judgment of anythin'," replied his father; so dogmatically, that Sam did not attempt to controvert the position.
In pursuance of this notable resolution, the services of the mottled-faced gentleman and of two other very fat coachmen--selected by Mr.Weller, probably, with a view to their width and consequent wisdom--were put into requisition:
and this assistance having been secured, the party proceeded to the public-house in Portugal Street, whence a messenger was despatched to the Insolvent Court over the way, requiring Mr.Solomon Pell's immediate attendance.