What--my old Guardian--what[!] turn inquisitor and take evidence incog.--SIR PETER.Give me your hand--Charles--I believe I have suspected you wrongfully; but you mustn't be angry with Joseph--'twas my Plan--CHARLES.Indeed!--
SIR PETER.But I acquit you--I promise you I don't think near so ill of you as I did--what I have heard has given me great satisfaction.
CHARLES.Egad then 'twas lucky you didn't hear any more.Wasn't it Joseph?
SIR PETER.Ah! you would have retorted on him.
CHARLES.Aye--aye--that was a Joke.
SIR PETER.Yes, yes, I know his honor too well.
CHARLES.Yet you might as well have suspected him as me in this matter, for all that--mightn't He, Joseph?
SIR PETER.Well well I believe you--
SURFACE.Would they were both out of the Room!
Enter SERVANT, whispers SURFACE
SIR PETER.And in future perhaps we may not be such Strangers.
SURFACE.Gentlemen--I beg Pardon--I must wait on you downstairs--Here is a Person come on particular Business----CHARLES.Well you can see him in another Room--Sir Peter and I haven't met a long time and I have something to say [to] him.
SURFACE.They must not be left together.--I'll send this man away and return directly--[SURFACE goes out.]
SIR PETER.Ah--Charles if you associated more with your Brother, one might indeed hope for your reformation--He is a man of Sentiment--Well! there is nothing in the world so noble as a man of Sentiment!
CHARLES.Pshaw! He is too moral by half--and so apprehensive of his good Name, as he calls it, that I suppose He would as soon let a Priest in his House as a Girl--SIR PETER.No--no--come come,--you wrong him.No, no, Joseph is no Rake but he is no such Saint in that respect either.I have a great mind to tell him--we should have such a Laugh!
CHARLES.Oh, hang him? He's a very Anchorite--a young Hermit!
SIR PETER.Harkee--you must not abuse him, he may chance to hear of it again I promise you.
CHARLES.Why you won't tell him?
SIR PETER.No--but--this way.Egad, I'll tell him--Harkee, have you a mind to have a good laugh against Joseph?
CHARLES.I should like it of all things--SIR PETER.Then, E'faith, we will--I'll be quit with him for discovering me.--He had a girl with him when I called.[Whispers.]
CHARLES.What[!] Joseph[!] you jest--
SIR PETER.Hush!--a little French Milliner--and the best of the jest is--she's in the room now.
CHARLES.The devil she is--
SIR PETER.Hush! I tell you.[Points.]
CHARLES.Behind the screen! Odds Life, let's unveil her!
SIR PETER.No--no! He's coming--you shan't indeed!
CHARLES.Oh, egad, we'll have a peep at the little milliner!
SIR PETER.Not for the world--Joseph will never forgive me.
CHARLES.I'll stand by you----
SIR PETER.Odds Life! Here He's coming--[SURFACE enters just as CHARLES throws down the Screen.]
Re-enter JOSEPH SURFACE
CHARLES.Lady Teazle! by all that's wonderful!
SIR PETER.Lady Teazle! by all that's Horrible!